About SPAM - and all who sail in her
SPAM ARE:
Vocals, Shaker and Sex Magnet:Dave "TBC" Bladen (Poor Dave - no nickname! PICK DAVE'S NICKNAME!)
Drums, Sweat and Confusion:Tony "Thunder" Giles
Bass, Vocals and Coolness:John "Wildman" Brown
Guitar, Vocals and Bum Notes:Mark "Darko" O'Neill
A Biography, of sorts...
On a beautiful day in the summer of '69, the four horsemen of SPAM rode into a town the legends now call "Cardigan" with utter pride and joy on a bullet with butterfly wings.
Formed in the belly of the God of Rock, the four mortal heroes battled their way out of hysteria with their axes wailing, drums a pounding and vocals tearing. Nothing could stop the sheer weight of this gallant 4-piece from completing their goal - to free all the musical slaves and keep them rockin' in the free world!
Wherever our valiant heroes have rocked, they have brought the house down with Hairpin's dulcet yet cutting tones, Darko's 6-string madness, Wildman's deep-sea sub bass and Thunder's animal-esque poundings.
From U2 to U-know-who, SPAM's rocking repertoire is enough to clear the lemons from anyone's lugholes and you won't see a posing pouch or a pansy pair of boxing boots in sight. No sir! This is one outfit that requires no dressing up. Their musical girth will sit you down, their passion will drop your jaw and their rock-god-like power will hit you like a stone.
SPAM are a meaty band, and they're here to rock!
Vital statistics...
Age:
Place of Birth:
Instrument:
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Crap Bands:
Fav Foods:
Yuk Foods:
Fav Colour:
Blonde / Brunette:
Nicknames:
22
Jelly Banana-ville
The Voice, Shaker
Audioslave, Nirvana, Green Day, Tragically Hip, Trafficker
All R&B music, gayboy bands
Lasagne, kebab
Parsley sauce, eggs
Blue
Brunette
TBC
Age:
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38
Planet Rock
Drums, guitar, mouth organ
Green Day, Phil Collins, Eric Clapton
Will Young, Madonna, Goldie Looking Chain
Stake, Chocolate, Sticky Buns
Anything organic
Red, blue
Blonde on top Brunette below
Thunder, TJ, Tapper, Dad
Age:
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39
My home planet was destroyed by the Death-Star™
Ernie Ball Musicman Stingray, Thunderbird, Trace Elliot 1x15 Combo
Ludwig Van and the Legion of the Deaf, The Rolling Beatles, Deely Stan
Trad Jazz, Ash (Oh, Matron!), Clagthorpe Brass Band
Italian, biscuits, an Italian lady covered in Honey! (Yum, Yum)
Indonesian, offal
Paisley
Italian
'Hey, you', Wildman, Marvellous
Age:
Place of Birth:
Instrument:
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Crap Bands:
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Yuk Foods:
Fav Colour:
Blonde / Brunette:
Nicknames:
29
300 miles from Wimbledon Common
ESP EC-1000 Deluxe guitar, Laney 30W valve combo, Boss GT-5
Van Halen, Audioslave, Abba (yes, it's true), Coldplay, Cure, Eva Cassidy
Arctic Monkeys, Arctic Monkeys, Arctic Monkeys
Ham sandwich, chicken satay, jam on toast, Crunchy Nut Cornflakes
Coffee chocolates, orange chocolates
Blue
Very blonde!
Darko, Fingers, Gog